Oh, how we love to complain. I’ve got problems, you’ve got problems. We’ve got problems! And annoyances. And inconveniences. And frustrations. And on and on and on.
Photo by Robert Labonte
I learned years ago that whatever I focus on becomes the focus of my life. Duh, right? The thing is, when I complain I am oh-so-aware of whatever it is that is bothering me, and if I complain enough, well then I hardly notice the good stuff.
Of course the reverse is also true. If I am grateful enough, well then I hardly notice the bad stuff. This doesn’t mean the bad stuff goes away but rather that my attention is no longer focused on the bad stuff so much of the time. The bad stuff still exists, and so does the good stuff.
That temptation to complain remains. I have complaints, dammit! Sometimes my complaints aren’t even said out loud- sometimes they just swirl and twirl and consume my thoughts and it’s hard to think about anything else.
Lately I’ve been feeling discontent. I can sit and stew for hours on all the things I don’t like. But this behavior isn’t helping me, it’s hurting me. It’s robbing me of enjoyment. It’s stealing my peaceful rest. It’s taking all the things that are good and making them insignificant.
Sometimes it’s healthy to complain, and there’s a better way to complain when it is the healthy choice. It’s up to me to decide when my complaining is healthy, and when it is bringing me down. Right now, my complaints are bringing me down because I don’t have control over the things I’m complaining about. No one really has control over the things I’m complaining about, and it’s time to focus on something other than my complaints.
I’ve had enough of this shit. Enough complaining. Enough stewing. Just enough.
I’m going on a complain-free diet. For two weeks I will not complain. If I catch myself complaining I’ll stop right there and say three things that are going well. I’m going to complain refrain for 14 days!
Will you join me?